Comforting Guide Journal

Oh, to see all the clean new running shoes, bright backpacks and hopeful young faces as they stand in lines to enter their schools this year!.  Summer is not even over.  Gardens are still going strong and the grass keeps growing.  But, parents must now work their days around times to leave for school, lunchtime, time to pick up the kiddos and then finish work and come home for supper.

After school come all the after-school lessons, piano, dance, football practice, soccer, skating, horseback riding lessons.  And then we have Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, 4-H, Awana and any number of after school clubs.  There is enough to keep us all busy every single night of
the week.  Where do we draw the line?

I have had to come up with ways of coping.  I like the children to be involved in things that will stretch and strengthen them . So I had to come up with some rules or guidelines in order to choose the right activities for each child

1. Will it improve his or her future job opportunities?  Is he/she learning any job skills along the way or is this just fun?
2. How much will it cost?  Are there hidden costs?  We have regularly paid $200 extra per child for recital clothing later in the year after all the monthly costs of dance lessons.  Yet, I know my daughters will never be prima ballerinas.
3. How much time does it take to go and come and how long does a parent sit in the car?
4. Will it make it necessary for us to eat fast food meals more than once a week?  That adds to the cost.
5. Is my daughter really built to be a dancer or could she gain coordination while playing soccer or softball?
6. Is there another activity that would be cheaper, closer to home and less time consuming that would be comparable in developing some area of expertise, leadership or personality?  Choose that one instead.
7. Do we already have the equipment necessary?  Brother’s skates, sister’s flute, etc.?  This makes it more affordable.
8. Is one of the parents able to be a coach, leader or assistant?  If that is the case then it becomes more of a family activity, which gives that activity more priority.  Family involvement is very important to my way of thinking.
9. Does it interfere with homework?  With family time?  With other important activities?  With church?  It goes to the bottom of the list.
10. Am I encouraging this just because I wanted to do it as a child?

These are questions that I have had to ask myself every year before we signed up to join teams or classes.  The people who organize these activities are either making part of a living doing it or are often parents themselves.  I find those who are parents are more understanding and helpful.  Those who do it as part of their work put more pressure on the family and finances in the end.

I hope someone else finds this helpful when choosing their extracurricular activities.  Our family got involved in community theater and learned singing, dancing and acting all in one activity.  We also helped design and paint sets, build props and make costumes.  These activities help to make a well-rounded child and the experience costs very little.  However, lessons are also valuable and personal.

Being involved in 4-H is a great family activity.  Parents need to be involved, however so that they understand what their child is really learning.  Each family needs to set a criteria and not be swept along with the tide of “Johnny is doing it.  I want to, too!”